Emotion Regulation Hacks: Two Powerful Calming Techniques from DBT

This podcast episode, hosted by psychiatrist Dr. Tracey Marks, introduces two remarkably effective techniques for reducing emotional overload: the Half-Smile and Willing Hands. Both are skills derived from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), a type of Cognitive Behavior Therapy initially designed for individuals with borderline personality disorder but offering widely beneficial skills for anyone experiencing intense emotional distress.

The first technique, the Half-Smile, involves relaxing facial muscles and gently turning the corners of the mouth upwards, akin to the Mona Lisa smile. It's not about feigning happiness or suppressing negative emotions, but rather leveraging the facial feedback hypothesis—the bidirectional relationship between facial expressions and emotions—to induce a sense of calm and peace. Dr. Marks provides various practical applications, including starting the day mindfully, practicing during quiet times, engaging with music, managing aggravation, relaxing, and even cultivating compassion by half-smiling while contemplating someone disliked, aiming for objective observation and empathy.

The second technique, Willing Hands, focuses on consciously relaxing the hands, keeping palms up and open. This contrasts with natural tension responses like clenched fists or crossed arms, which are primitive protective postures observed even in infants. By adopting the Willing Hands position, individuals physically and emotionally open themselves up, fostering a sense of vulnerability and acceptance. This physical posture can encourage a more accepting and calm mindset, particularly useful in situations that typically induce anxiety or discomfort, such as public speaking.

Both the Half-Smile and Willing Hands are presented as skills that, with consistent practice, become more automatic and effective in promoting emotional regulation by decreasing the intensity of negative emotions. Dr. Marks emphasizes that these techniques are not intended to eliminate or invalidate emotions, as emotions are a normal and vital part of life, serving as signals about our experiences. Instead, they provide tools to manage emotional responses, allowing for greater control and well-being.

"Are you often overwhelmed by powerful emotions?"

"These two techniques are dialectical behavior therapy skills."

"It's not about pretending to be happy, or suppressing negative emotions."

"Research has shown a bidirectional relationship between facial expressions and emotions."

"This is known as the facial feedback hypothesis."

"You're not trying to give them excuses. You're trying to be an objective observer of their life."

"Have you ever noticed that when you feel tense your hands naturally contract and make a fist?"

"The willing hands position opens you up physically and emotionally. It creates a level of vulnerability and acceptance."

"Both of these techniques, Half-Smile and Willing Hands can promote emotional regulation by helping to decrease the intensity of the negative emotions."

"Emotions are a normal part of life, and serve as signals about our experiences."