Sensing vs. Intuitive Temperaments: Navigating Relationships and Recovery

This episode delves into the temperament dimension of sensing (S) and intuitive (N), one of four key dimensions that shape an individual's preferred environments, learning styles, and problem-solving approaches. Temperament is defined as a relatively stable set of traits, and understanding one's own and others' temperaments can significantly improve communication, enhance relationships, and reduce stress. The discussion highlights how stress often pushes individuals to become more polarized in their temperament preferences, making self-awareness crucial for wellness and recovery plans. The other temperament dimensions briefly mentioned include extroversion/introversion, thinking/feeling (laws vs. ethics), and judging/perceiving (structured vs. spontaneous).

The core distinction between sensing and intuitive styles is explored through information processing: acquisition, conceptualization, and "caring" (motivation). Sensing individuals prefer taking in information in details, conceptualize things from parts to a whole (inductive reasoning), are practical, realistic, and focus on facts. They tend to live in the "real world" and prefer established methods. In contrast, intuitive individuals prefer the big picture first, conceptualize things as small parts of a whole (deductive reasoning), thrive on abstraction, inspiration, and insights, and are drawn to possibilities and "aha" moments, often finding day-to-day facts mundane. Examples like organizing computer files, managing finances, and family planning illustrate these divergent approaches.

These temperament differences create potential conflicts in relationships and recovery. Sensors, being practical and detail-oriented, may feel overwhelmed by the intuitive's broad-stroke, "figure it out later" approach, while intuitives may feel stifled by the sensor's need for plans and adherence to facts. In recovery, sensors follow structured treatment plans, focusing on alleviating specific symptoms, whereas intuitives view recovery as a path to happiness and freedom, potentially getting frustrated by mundane tasks or rigid plans. The podcast emphasizes that neither style is superior; they are simply different ways of approaching the world.

Practical insights and recommendations are provided for blending these styles. Clinicians and individuals are encouraged to foster communication, create reasonable structured goals, and weigh costs and benefits based on ultimate objectives. Sensors need to be encouraged to "look up" from details to the bigger picture and reframe daily tasks in terms of overarching goals, while intuitives need to keep lists of necessary tasks and seek consultation for overlooked details. The episode stresses the importance of compromise and collaboration, leveraging each temperament's strengths—the sensor's ability to provide structure and details, and the intuitive's capacity for vision and creativity—to achieve mutual goals and a more fulfilling life and recovery.

temperament is a relatively stable set of traits referring to your preferred environments

most of the time we find when people are really really stressed they tend to become more polar if you will in their temperament and what they need in order to feel in control and relaxed

understanding her personal preferences so I'm not imparting what I want on to her but I'm understanding what makes her happy and what causes her stress

learning is made up of three parts acquisition conceptualization and caring

sensors tend to be very practical and realistic they use inductive reasoning which means small to big and prefer facts and live in the real world

the intuitive person tends to be a little bit more broad stroke and they go okay well we see that we make this much money and we can figure out how to use that money because there are also options like credit cards and loans and things like that

the dreamer may feel stifled in a relationship with a sensor because the sensor is very very practical where the sensor may feel overwhelmed by the dreamer

into orders they don't even think the box is necessary they're just like oh hey you know we want to build a doghouse so why get plans let's just go get some wood and see what we can do with it

sensors but the facts kind of people sometimes get stuck in the box because this is what we're doing this is the practical way to do it this is the way we've always done it it works great let's not make any changes because then we risk upsetting the applecart

the Intuit or can make anything overly complicated they want to look at meta concepts and about the impact of this on that

sensors can oversimplify and say well this is what we have this is where we what we need to do in order to achieve our goal ABC done

sensors are content in general believe if it isn't broken don't fix it and may think those preferring intuition are impractical

intuitive like to live in the world of possibilities so we've got this right now but wouldn't it be better if or how could we make this more efficient